Why?

I believe that God chooses people to do specific things in this word. Some people entertain, some people create beauty, while others concentrate on making a wonderful family. Then there are those that are called to make a difference in the world, to sacrifice their own desires so that they can help others. I feel that I've been called to do this and there are sometimes when I'm happy about it and other times when I'm a bit angry. Why God did you choose me for this? Why can't I be an Anthropologist or Writer and spend my days studying and writing. Now, don't get me wrong Anthropologists and writers help the world in their own way. But they don't get down and dirty in the mess that are people are in. They don't deal with the death and violence and despair that a police officer, or social worker or even a teacher has to face daily. I've been called to the field of social work, and it frightens me. I don't understand why God has chosen me for this. But I'll accept the duty because I know that there are people out there that need my help and that because my life would not be fulfilling if I went a different direction.

Venting

In a political debate concerning war in the world someone asked me who I pledged my allegiance to. I pledge my allegiance and loyalty to those across the globe who are in need, who literally have nothing. The people in Africa, Iraq, Iran, Israel and Palestine who need help, To the people in South Korea who have the terror of living next to North Korea, To the people in North Korea who who are stuck in a country under a monster. To the men, women and children of the U.S who are dying on the streets while we shout to the world that we are the land of opportunity, I give you my loyalty and promise to do what I can to help them. I cannot give my pledge to one country, one group of people, one religion. In my genetic background my ancestors came out of Africa and settled into places like Kashmir and Saudi Arabia before continuing onto France and then to the rest of Northern Europe. In this line I have blood from Muslims, Jews, Christians and Pagans. I am a child of the world, and I give my love to it. I find God in everyone, in every religion because God is one. To the Muslims he is Allah, to the Jews and Christians he is Yahweh, El Shaddai, Jesus. to the Hindus, there is Krishna, Ganesha, Saraswati and many more who make up one divine presence in their life. For others, he/she is simply God. And God is in everyone, every place, everything that exists. So, when it comes to war, I do not give my allegiance to specific countries who are warring against each other, but rather I give it to God's children who are lying broken and in despair because worldly powers have taken it upon themselves to decree what is right, what is wrong and who God is. I give my allegiance to the people who have love and compassion are trying their best to survive.

Career

I suppose I'm like a lot of people out there. I've been in college for three years now and I have no idea what to do with my life. I see all these things on Tv and read in books about people doing extraordinary things with their lives. Like battling evil robots or fighting for the sake of good. I'm a big Harry Potter fan and sometimes when I read the books, or see the movies, I'm saddened because real life isn't like that. Real life is about ordinary people doing ordinary things. We do have some amazing people out there (soldiers, teachers, police men, nurses... ) but it never seems to be enough for me. I long for the days of old, when the nights would fight honorably for king and country, the weight of the world hanging on their shoulders as they made to triumph over evil. Legends of Robin Hood and his heroic deeds have filled my bedtime stories, along with The Three Musketeers. They lay in hiding, waiting for the perfect opportunity to make sure those in power did not abuse their privileges and that their people would always be taken care of. In the real world, life just doesn't work like that anymore. Everyone has their own agenda. I've always wanted to be the one to save the day, to unite the world in peace, to rescue those in destress. I wanted to go on adventures, running from the corrupt law as it tried its best to silence us. I want people to look to me for guidance and to know that I would do everything in my power to keep them safe. Of course, in the tales of such heroes, they never asked to be one, instead it was thrust upon them. And maybe that is why I will never be in that position, because I want it. I want to be great, and to have people know that I am great. Perhaps that is my downfall, and yet if you look close at the legends you notice that they might not have asked for their duties, but once they had them they also had an arrogance in the way that they thought that they were the only ones able to do the job. Maybe they didn't ask for such charges, but secretly wanted them anyways. I mean, who doesn't want to be great, who doesn't want to go down in history? I can't think of anyone I know that would want to fade into the background and be meaningless in society. We all want something.
So that's my problem, wanting all that, what am I supposed to do in college now. It seems like anything I choose wouldn't mean anything, that it would be settling for something less that I feel I can do. Who else feels this way?